Gardening

Finding the writing rhythm again ... early walk musing and storying, drafting, later editing, polishing, posting ... hoping for some help with the more difficult ideas and recognising the limits of the platform for feedback, creating a bespoke email address for readers to easily respond ... sday.weardao@gmail.com  ... let me know if you want your thoughts posted on here ...

So, wandering the hills, with a mixture of sunshine and showers ... pondering the question of suffering and finding the gardening metaphor apt ... you dream of a beautiful garden in which to wander .... the one you have is full of weeds, brambles, stinging nettles and frankly a mess ... there is suffering and in this case the cause is clear: your dream is impossible because of the state of your garden ... before doing anything about the mess, you could simply change the dream and imagine instead a nature sanctuary ... harvest blackberries in autumn ... carefully collect nettles for soup, tea or for fertiliser ... enjoy the abundance of insect life ... listen to the birds singing, the bees humming .... to be honest, this is tempting for the writer, who is a lazy gardener ... but the neighbours are not impressed and you really dream of a space for flowers and vegetables, with spiral paths ... so an effort is required ... the weeds, nettles, brambles are removed ... the space is restored to bare earth ... a blank canvas on which to create your dream ... with more effort the space takes shape, as seasons permit, the flowers bloom, the fruit falls, the spuds are ready to dig ... and if left untended, of course, the weeds soon return along with the suffering of a lost dream ... this story has some basis in reality at no. 7, with some expert help from proper gardeners ... and indeed it has reverted to a mess, untended and now with the rubble from the fireplace awaiting collection ... the writer, however, is not suffering and not just because he is along the terrace at no.4, with its more developed structure of mature shrubs, deck and raised beds ...

Does the no-self story sit in this garden too? Well maybe, inasmuch as the somebody has opinions, concepts of a proper garden ... though nobody could easily enjoy the weedy mess or the blank canvas, a nobody who lacked compassion for gardening neighbours would be better wandering footloose without garden or any sustained companions to feed the somebody ...which is where the everybody, or a new somebody appears, with neighbours to consider ... and if you sense this topic is losing touch with reality, please do write ....  Facebook World has quite a few Friends exhibiting symptoms of plot loss, having started off along similar routes, maybe drug assisted ... finding anguish instead of bliss, not anchoring .... skipping stages ... getting stuck in unhelpful dimensions ... not to mention some seeming inauthentic ... quoting insights of the sages endlessly, even teaching from the books they read .... not living it ...

Time to wrap up the rambling .... the sun is shining and a second walk calls ... maybe collect some new season wild garlic for supper ... even connect with "real" humans to earth the wilder flights of imagination ... and note to self and no-self that interbeing wants exploring ... indeed developing if the projects are to take form ...

somebody, nobody, everybody ...

This no-self topic is cause for more reflection ...

Rupert Spira says: "Being somebody leads to suffering; being nobody leads to peace; being everybody leads to happiness."

Maybe so, though a lack of self-esteem is generally considered a psychological weakness ... as is an excess of it ... perhaps these stages can't be bypassed ... perhaps a healthy, balanced sense of self is necessary to face the prospect of being nothing ... for a while ... hmmm that peace is very seductive, especially if the self-being suffering has been extreme ... is it safe to rest in no-self for the duration? Is this the trap of the permanent retreatant?  Certainly, solitude is an aid to no-being ... supporting the view that we only exist in relation with others ... the selfie craze illustrates this ... look carefully at the image of yourself or another, taken when alone ... check the eyes ... there is a often a vacancy ...

So, does shifting from nobody to everybody entail a return to somebody? What if the discovery of nobody was not so much the annihilation of self, as the recognition that the illusory self as the centre of the universe may be replaced by a lightly held and fluid self as a fragment of the whole .. the everybody or everything as the deeper reality ...

Buddha said: There is suffering; there are the causes of suffering; there is the cessation of suffering; there are the ways to end suffering.

Claire says suffering is necessary to lead us to the spiritual path ... on the road to Santiago de Compostela there were plenty of pilgrims embracing suffering with heavy packs, bleeding blisters ... maybe suffering is often the spark .... but is it necessary to seek it out? Flagellation as a practice? Once the causes of suffering are identified, isn't that the opportunity to find the ways to eliminate suffering? First from our own fragment of the whole and then from the world.. .. ?

This is getting interesting folks and it would be good to have some feedback ... if the comment function is too hard (and it could be easier google) maybe drop an email?

Thanks!

More no-self ...

Claire arrives for philosophical discourse ... deep into her journey and resonating with the no-self story, from experience and the books she brings ... Ramana Maharshi and Nisargatta ... a walk with Jake, the very affectionate collie, lunch, more discussion ... the time flies, the book is no further forward, projects neither, except some energy generated from sharing the retreat centre plans ... which may fit into her developing journey sometime ... anyway, the combination of mystic and entrepreneur is intriguing and much as she wants to drop the business role and concentrate on the interior journey, she does know from experience how business works ... as does Gary ... still a mystery here, though not too late to learn perhaps ...

becoming ...

First lambs spotted along the back road, sprinkling of snow still on the tops and a cool breeze in early sun encouraging washing on the line .... always a simple joy!

Reflecting on Cameron's dark, constricted version of no-self ... no fun, he says ... and how integrating the various illusory selves available to the writer, philosopher, social-entrepreneur, father, brother, friend ... finds vast space in which to play ... starting early each morning before Sun rises (trickier as He is getting up earlier each day) settling the mind, waking the body with coffee, porridge, walking ... exploring options and priorities ...

The Residential Home project awaits further discussion with local players ... a local directory "Eating Out About Weardale by Bus" ... an expansion of the Wheels to Meals scheme recognising the free bus pass still available to senior citizens .... like this one, who finds the conviviality of public transport energising .... and its availability sometimes restricting ... a car sharing arrangement maybe?

Diogo, last seen on these pages in Gibraltar, sends a heartwarming message from Coimbra .. having spent much of last year in Croatia with an Erasmus programme, has discovered self-love, which opened his heart to family reconciliation and a new appreciation of Portugal ...

Gary brings a copy of his book, which itself diverts the writer to reading role and competes with other exponents of the art of mindfulness for attention (and in the end it is not the reading but the practice itself which liberates) ... anyway, you can find it in good bookshops and at Hive ... the ethical version of Amazon ... so that's two free ads in one line and maybe a review to follow when it has been read and digested ... some fascinating conversation around the holographic universe, mindfulness in education as well as therapeutic intervention, retreat centres ... the shared dream of A Place to Be come back full circle ... the Law of Attraction, secrets of abundance ... and encouragement for this blog to become a book ... heard before and maybe time to pursue a publisher ... though the writer struggles to take the role seriously enough to imagine a large audience out there for these ramblings ...

Meanwhile, here is a peek at the beautiful Retreat Centre in Stanhope, home for residential and daily opportunities to recreate your life as if it were a work of art .... starting with the bundle of thoughts that constitute a self ... unlearning what no longer serves .... interbeing with others on the journey ... the first £150k is pledged, another £350k on the way to bring the 7 year vision to fruition ...

more being

... the end of February and a beautiful sunny day in the Dale ... an early walk over the tops, much calmer than the previous two excursions in the tail end of storm Doris, feeling the force of the wind ... helpful uphill from behind, harder sideways on along the edge ... musing on the anthropomorphism of the meteorologists and the absurd hyperbole of certain newspapers, specialising in doom and gloom stories, designed to keep us indoors, in fear of the weather ... and when the weather is benign, there are always dangerous foreigners out there to scare us...

The Editor writes, wondering where the blog has gone ... admonishing the blogger for neglecting the readers ... the perils of taking the writer role too seriously, readers placing expectations on writers ... hmm ... maybe a little encouragement helps when the muse is resting ...

A trip up the Dale to visit friend and erstwhile colleague in service design ... having retired from the very successful Cafe, after a series of strokes, each time recovering functions thanks to a flexible brain, capable of adapting and rewiring ... though since October another, unexplained, phenomenon shut him down ... speechless and in a dark and constricted space, where the very concept of self disappeared ... only to reappear just as suddenly quite recently ... the old self reappearing and growing through validation on Facebook and the "Likes" and "Comments" of hundreds of well-wishers ... a fascinating conversation and maybe one he will expand upon in comments on here ...

Meanwhile, the neglected writer role has been replaced by social entrepreneur role, validated by local folks encouraging the efforts to re-open the Residential Home ... though any of them might have initiated it ... local retired journalist and blog reader questions the authority of picking up the role as catalyst in the project ... also a mystery here, though no more so than finding the wonderful book by French writer on graceful ageing, Marie de Hennezel and "The Warmth of the Heart Prevents Your Body from Rusting" in a charity shop in Durham yesterday.

The parallel project takes some form with a meeting arranged with Gary, A Place to Be co-founder and author of  recently published "Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching" as well as a warm re-connection with Cheryl, yoga teacher and partner of Naturopath Charlie, who you may have seen on here on the first of December last year ...

Daily life entails learning to live with a cat ... she comes with the house ... and we spend time trying to train each other to comply with our requirements .... not walking on kitchen work surfaces, finishing food before demanding more, keeping off the bed on one side ... food on demand, attention at any time of day or night, access to all areas, on the other .... gradually a compromise evolves ... this one is called Tarot ... quieter than Poppy from the Spanish villa sitting, and mercifully shits and pisses outside ... mostly in the garden of no. 7 when it was dug over ... and at no.7, the landlord, having replaced the roof to deal with the damp, is installing a wood burning stove ... Tommy at no.6, now 93 years old is slowing down, the lovely Sandra at no 5 is the perfect next-door neighbour, always sharing ... including the wifi, strong enough to pass through the stone walls ...++

Back in San Enrique, the crumbling villa and ancient cat are looking for another caretaker from August ... and no.7 Wear Terrace is looking for a new tenant ... once the work is completed in a week or two ...

The Editor enquires about future walks ... which are in mind, though the only firm arrangement is a week in beautiful Brockwood in July ...

energy

It seems the time is right for the residential home project ... the house sitting empty for more than two years is crying out for some love and attention ... a swift swoop on the dormant Facebook Group from the previous protest campaign yields over 300 interested folks and some cross posting to local noticeboard produces some more ... offers of help arrive, including locals with experience in the Care sector ... some say it is too hard and that is the reason it has not yet been tried ... focusing on those with practical experience of creating things raises the energy levels and the project starts to take form ... slowly ... meanwhile other games are played, at root, as always, about energy trading ... power games ... humans having this impediment to free flow energy called thinking ... from that blockages ... psychological inheritance creating the problem ... tactics emerge of roles and relationships in the interlocking dramas of life ... attention from others replacing the core light and free flow energy and in this scenario any attention is better than none ... hence the victim games ...

As above, so below ... and vice versa ... though, as always language traps us as much as informs us .. above and below being poor representations of a multi-dimensional universe(s) ... so, if we have been speaking of the games at local community level, the same goes on at family level where energy stealing often happens ... at national level, with attention seeking politicos posing polarised positions as if people may only choose between two options, neither meeting the needs of the times, but through brainwashing and hypnosis pushing us into separate camps to cheer on equally ludicrous representations of humanity at its basest. It is said that the games are also being played at cosmic level ... maybe so ... certainly there are many dimensions beyond the three of space and one of time (or space/time) our rational minds are programmed for ... and in these realms, described by ancient mystics, we may dally at our peril and for our entertainment ...

Back in the village, avoiding the dark energy, focusing on the light, collaborators appear ... wanting to improve the lives of the people ... in this case the elders neglected by an atomised society ... their wisdom and experience ignored ... demonised instead as a "demographic time-bomb" ... keeping sight of the abundance all around, avoiding the scarcity stories ... and practical challenges of side-stepping the traps of the freemasons and their ritual dramas ... no longer masons, though that is the basis of their esoteric secrets, certainly not free, since submitting to hierarchies, with each level increasing the susceptibility to blackmail, surely enslaves the otherwise upstanding citizens tempted into the ranks ... a topic best approached in side vision awareness and not energised with direct attention ...

All this sounds spookier than normal, though the village is in another reality one of the friendliest to be found ... and that is the reality I will be focusing on!

Warming up ...

Whilst wandering about Spain and Portugal may seem like practical activity, in another sense the whole adventure has been a retreat, albeit in motion ... lots of reflection, examining thoughts, meeting many different characters fleetingly, wondering where the "I" actually is when not interacting with another ... and if we may divide the spiritual path into theory and practice, returning to Stanhope and the projects is mostly practising ... though there is plenty of space for early sitting (confusingly, also known as practice), reading ("Who Am I? And If So, How Many", a timely find ... a return to Jack Kornfield's classic, "After the Ecstasy, the Laundry" ... novels also offering insights) and walking the hills ...no bad weather there, just the wrong clothes ... and winter gear has increased the amount of stuff owned, maybe double the rucksack load ...

Patiently preparing two projects, teasing out the networks needed, seeking out the key collaborators ("Everyone Dreams but Projects take Teams") and establishing the necessary tools for the business plans ... a trip to the city for a laptop, finding a warm place to work (which turns out to be the bedroom) the two properties considered both on the market now for a couple of years and maybe quite a few months more before the visions settle into new forms ... maybe some blog editing for the long awaited book ...

Meanwhile, recognising a tendency to hermitude, invitations accepted for cultural activity ... the Tempest at the Gala, live screened from Stratford; football at Newcastle, ads from sponsors Sports Direct and Wonga prominent all round and indicative of the sorry mess professional football in general and Newcastle United FC in particular are in ... 52,000  in attendance at no small cost for rather meagre fare, as new Messiah Rafa Benitez and previous manager MacLaren squeeze the play into central zones to limit space for excitement and danger, 1-0 and 3 points all that is required ... in a more exciting era, another Messiah, Keegan or King Kevin, took the view that scoring more goals than the opposition was the best way to play ... in the modern game, ruled by fear, the idea is that if they don't score, we don't lose ... so there, amidst the circuses to distract us, sits a metaphor for Life ...

As for the dramas awaiting as projects unfold, the art is playing the part without taking it personally ... avoiding the ego games wherever possible, appealing to higher sensibilities ... neither project representing anything but mutual benefit in the community ... and not attached to outcomes for either in the end ... let's see!