Wednesday 24 March 2021

Birthdays and Deathdays ...

One of the fascinating features of relative Time, is the human response to being born and dying.
Of course, in systems transcending linear time, living and dying are inseparable, since consciousness continues, whilst bodies don't. .. the ensuing question of what eternal consciousness gets up to if linear time is not real tends to be neglected ... the logical answer seems to be that all these lives springing up as babies and dying at any time, preferably as old wise women or men ... are all happening at once. Which is weird.

Such thoughts are prompted by the birthday, 34th, of elder daughter, whose Grandpa passed very recently, with marbles mostly intact and body too. A poignant coincidence for the daughter, who was close to her Grandpa, like her sister. Their Granny, meanwhile, continues a while longer, with body and mind in poor shape, confused about what's happened to her husband.

Of course such dramas play out every day everywhere, with varying degrees of suffering all round. The drama for the daughters, or granddaughters, is different to that of the children, four still living and lucky enough to have had notice of the impending departure so that could tie up any loose ends, say the things they wanted to say and hear what their kindly Father had to say. A good death, or as good as it gets I'd say. Good memories for elder daughter every birthday from now on, and for her sister, younger daughter ... both apparently quite stable and used to discussing death and having been lucky to have attended their Grandma's funeral as teenagers some time ago.

Dying, naturally, though inevitable, is the second biggest crisis in our lives after being born. That apparently is painful for the Mother, though I don't know about that, despite attending both arrivals ... an amazing experience for the father who gazed at both girls in turn enraptured, holding them for some time while their Mum had a sleep ... frankly they still amaze me after 3 decades and who knows maybe another one or even two?! Either way I'm happy, especially if I manage to die before they do ... their uncle, my elder brother, died before our parents and with his three daughters quite young ... in Australia in fact, so they're Australian now the middle one having giving birth recently and all three plus their Mum having overcome the trauma apparently ... frankly, my Mum was already prepared to depart, and Dad as well, having lived their three score years and ten plus some and worn out ... when news of their elder son's inoperable brain tumour arrived, Mum, in hospital with a dodgy heart, requested her God to arrange for her to take his place ... that didn't work and doubtless most parents and grandparents through linear time have tried that strategy, mostly without success ... the best we can do is treat all misfortune as another opportunity to learn ... and all good fortune, however we perceive it, with gratitude.

What else can we do?

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